Yasmina's Necklace: A Staged Reading (The Den Theatre)

I have been thinking about Yasmina’s Necklace—the complex and deceptively powerful new play from Rohina Malik—all week.

In our own city, the heavy pollution of bigotry has thinned in the past seven days, and an atmosphere suitable for all living, breathing things is finally perceptible; our legislators have—at long fucking last—recognized that gay men and women can legally couple in a kinda-mostly-the-same-sort-of way as “regular” people. Through angry propaganda and hatred, the basic right to love was finally granted.

For those who advocate egalitarianism, the vulgar braying of a callow populace can actually be fairly comforting. One sees a wrong-headed opponent loudly gushing intolerance like a wimpy firefighter handling his first hose, and one feels an annoyed amusement at the situation: You may get a little wet, but they’re the ones who are going to break something. Because the argument against tolerance always goes something like, “Those people are different and if we recognize them as being equal to us in any way then a baby will be killed by a dog-blowing Unitarian with an anti-Easter agenda.” And so the battle cry of open-mindedness becomes: Victory via revelatory preposterousness!

One only need catalog the test-flares fired by the proponents of idiocy to understand: *BOOM* Gay marriage directly leads to the dissolution of the family! *BOOM* Immigrants are all leaving anchor babies in Fresno to tether themselves to our social safety nets! *BOOM* How dare they build a mosque at Ground Zero! Sharia law! Jihad! Muslims!

What is truly embarrassing is that this blathering even finds a foothold to begin with. Things like love and understanding are jettisoned so quickly in favor of screeching accusations that one is aghast at the effort needed simply to maintain the high levels of ignorance. Because hate does not come face to face with who or what is being hated. Rather, hate gurgles and sputters in it’s own putridity. It’s like a deep-fat fryer: Whatever you cook in it may taste delicious at first, but it’ll fucking kill you.

Now, I realize the contradiction in speaking about tolerance and love in such a vitriolic way for I too feel the tinge of hatred towards those who violently oppose what it is I know to be right. And on a basic, emotional level, I understand where they are coming from; a threat is a threat and must be destroyed.

It’s just…when you see a play like Yasmina’s Necklace—which tells the story of two young Muslims trying to love each other despite being viciously damaged by the unjust war in Iraq and the never-ending suspicions of a country they desperately need to call home, you get very upset that is has to be so hard for them because it really shouldn’t have to be.

Yasmina’s Necklace: A+

-John Taflan

Eric & Andy LIVE at the Jeff Awards!!!

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Eric Roach and Anderson Lawfer, curators and founders of the insider Chicago Theatre blog Reviews You Can Iews! and writers for TheatreInChicago, will be hosting a “Red Carpet” style event from the Park West Theater at the 38th annual Joseph Jefferson Awards on June 6th, 2011 that will be streamed live and can be seen at TheatreInChicago.com.

The production will be handled by Brad Little and Ben Fuchsen from Oracle Theatre Productions who have live streamed other theatrical events in Chicago including a recent performance of Woyzeck from the Oracle Theatre. Mike Ooi will be directing the night’s festivities with the help of guest liason David Seeber.

With their irreverent blend of comedy and knowledge of the theatre world in Chicago, Eric & Andy, two working actors and sometimes critics, will be interviewing their peers and colleagues in a 1 hour interview special for the first time ever.

Never before has the Jeff Awards allowed coverage of this scope, as people at home will be able to tune in for free and watch the red carpet rituals in a meet-and-greet hour of the city’s most prestigious awards for the Theatre Arts.

Coverage will begin at 6:00pm from inside the fabulous Park West Theater and last for a non-stop action filled 60 minutes that will include interviews of presenters, nominees, theatre personalities and heavyweights.

You will have to tune in to see what happens, but be sure it will be exciting and add a level of distinction to these already revered awards!

Just tune in for free here at TheatreInChicago.com on June 6 at 6:00pm for all of the information and highlights as it will be live streamed and also available to watch afterwards.

The 38th Anniversary Non-Equity Jeff Awards Ceremony will be held on Monday, June 6, 2011, at the Park West, 322 W. Armitage, Chicago, IL. Doors open for a cash bar at 6:00pm., with a light buffet at 6:30pm., and the presentation ceremony at 7:30pm. Tickets are $40 in advance, $45 at the door. The ceremony will honor excellence in Chicago theatres not under a union contract for productions that opened between April 1, 2010, and March 31, 2011. A complete list of this year’s nominations can be found here.

Big Love (Chicago Fusion Theatre) (Audience Review)

Upon entering the Royal George Theatre’s third-floor studio space, Chicago Fusion Theatre’s mostly non-Equity audience expertly contained its disappointment at the realization that the show it was attending would not, in fact, be an adaptation of the Bill Paxton multi-wife star vehicle, Big Love. That bold and impetuous effervescence was just one of many surprising treats gifted last Thursday at the mass’s five billionth appearance: Big Love.

Founded between 550 and 250 BC, audience has long upheld a proud tradition of listening to what is being said, occasionally reacting, and ultimately applauding upon completion of a given work. While only mildly distracted by cell phone usage and some late-game restroom sprinting, audienceBigLove grounded its assemblage in an honest enthusiasm that has long been the trademark of the Chicago style (prior digressions into the oft-imitated and experimental “non-appreciative” New York approach have never been entirely successful for the collective).

As expected, the dimming of the house lights roused audienceBigLove into an attentive state. With eyes and hearts taking in exposition after plot point after inciting incident, audienceBigLove proved how truly present it was (as always, clear boundaries were established with a lack of talking during those first, important moments). I must say, though: I feel (and pray) that audience is reaching the end of its love affair with pre and initial show respect. I would love to see audience taking some risks the next time out. AudienceBigLove proved itself to be memorable and supportive, but a few grunts and cat-calls may help audience reach new pinnacles of excellence in the craft (as seen during the golden age of Vaudeville/vegetable flinging).

All personal preference aside, audienceBigLove brought its biggest grins and most boisterous laughs to play with, last weekend. During a particularly exhilarating sequence, audienceBigLove, starting first with some scattered chortles, built a magnificent cascade of laughs around an especially arresting bout of tomato squeezing. Fresh varietals of joy were poured out during a bathtub-bound serenade as well. Moments like that really remind you why you go to the audience.

It’s comforting to know that after hundreds of tens of decades, audience still knows how to appreciate one heck of a show.

AudienceBigLove: A-

-John Taflan

Murder for 2- A Killer Musical (Chicago Shakespeare Theatre)

You ever heard of this fella, Alan Schmuckler? Apparently he is the hottest shit in town. Everybody talks about him like he is the musical theatre equivalent to say... Joe Dempsey or sweet Jon Steinhagen.

In fact, they put on the press release something to the effect of, "Alan Schmuckler, creator of Musical Theatre"...

Anyway, this Alan Schmuckler character is the real deal. You can tell because he can play piano and sing at the same time. He can play piano, sing AND stay in character the whole time!

Did you ever hear of "Ten Little Indians"? It's sort of this high brow Agatha Christie style murder mystery where there has been a murder at a house and a detective comes over and has to figure out who the killer is. The suspects are usually people who were close to the victim but didn't like him (it's always a him).

I will give you an example.

Pembroke Jameson is a wealthy nightclub owner and mystery novelist who happens to be writing his final opus about a wealthy nightclub owner and novelist who is murdered by someone he is close to at his home at his surprise birthday party. When the detective arrives, his closest friends stand in complete disinterest at his filthy bullet ridden body on the floor before them.

There is the maid, a tramp named Tina who once dated Jameson's old high school teacher, but broke it off when Jameson took everything in a bank foreclosure. The wife, an aging starlet known around Hollywood for her engaging and elegant blowjob style. The nephew, next in line for the family business. A dirty hobo wanderer that happens to be staying with the family performing menial tasks like cleaning the weapon collection. A visiting baseball player/state senator that was holding an important secret about something. And a trained killer that is well known around the world for murdering important business men.

Which of these people is holding the secret to this unspeakable crime!?

So this is the sort of plot line that you find with these sorts of things. Let me tell you what makes this piece different.

There are only 2 actors, and it is a musical.

This dude Alan Schmuckler plays the detective through the whole thing, so... that's not super interesting, but he is really really really good at it. He wears this jacket and has this songbird voice and this sweet curly hair and he is just...oh man, I am shivering right now just thinking about him.

All the other characters are played by this bro from New York called Joe Kinosian. From what I can tell, Kinosian is about 7 feet tall and about 85 pounds. He looks sort of like the REALLY gay guy from "Will and Grace", Not the sort of gay guy, or the lady.
He sort of sounds like him too. Come to think of it, IS he the really gay guy from "Will and Grace"?
Whatever, no use worrying about it now.

Anyway, this man Kinosian plays all these characters and plays piano and has a good singing voice, but what makes him so special, is that he also wrote the music for the show. There's something about talent like that that you can not describe. Watching this dude run around and do these voices and sing and dance and have just fucking perfect comic timing, there's just no way to say what it is. Let's make up a word with Latin roots. Beneanthrodominator. That means the best master man.

Sure, the show is maybe 10 minutes too long. Sure, there isn't any real message. It's at Navy Pier, so nobody there really cares, they just want a few laughs and a few pretty songs and a dark theater to maybe get a nap in after a long day in the 3D maze or the dinner cruise on the Majestic.

I wish there was a way to get more actors to go out to Chicago Shakes because it is so fucking nice. It is big and clean and fancy and most of us feel totally out of place the minute you walk to the ticket window because there are all these old ladies in slacks, but if you think about it, we are all pretty uncomfortable in every aspect of our lives, so take a chance.

Go and see this play. You will have a fun time and maybe pick up a few pointers about how to be more likable!!


A+

-Anderson Lawfer, Eric Roach

Slaughter City (Jackalope Theatre)

"Well, it is certainly no disrespect to anyone that is vegan or vegetarian. As you know, I am the most judgment-free human being on the earth. However, it has many interpretations but for me this evening. If we don't stand up for what we believe in and if we don't fight for our rights, pretty soon we're going to have as much rights as the meat on our own bones. And, I am not a piece of meat."

-Lady Gaga

Like many of you, I’ve spent the better part of the 2010-2011 season combing my way through Target trying to find Lady Gaga’s new line of meat clothing. Shortly after the VMAs, I sniffed out rumors of the new line that led me from Macy’s to Banana Republic to the Cheesecake Factory. But the hunt always proved fruitless, and I’ve had to make do with Mossimo shirts stained with Sweet Baby Ray’s BBQ Sauce. I could not fathom what was delaying the launch of this sizzling new line.

Naomi Wallace’s Slaughter City, directed by Kaiser Ahmed and produced by Jackalope Theatre in the Raven Theatre’s West Stage, seeks to answer that burning question, “Where are my porterhouse PJs? And what does it take to get them?” We’ve known for some time that a line of meat clothing would have to be off-the-rack to be profitable, and Slaughter City offers us a glimpse into what the hell is clogging up the bacon bikini pipeline. It seems some people aren’t treated well by other people, and something needs to be done about it. “If we don’t stand up for what we believe in and if we don’t fight for our rights, pretty soon we’re going to have as much rights as the meat on our own bones,” said Lady Gaga. And apparently Naomi Wallace was listening, even though Slaughter City and Madonna’s Express Yourself came first.

The design elements are really strong – it took me a while to figure out that I was not in the secret meat sweatshop where Lady Gaga’s emperor’s clothes are made. At first glance, I thought that Eric and Andy had arranged a surprise Make-A-Wish party for me, but alas, it was an actual play, with acting and everything. The play centers on a group of delicious meatpackers (Kristin Anderson, Ryan Heindl, and Katherine Swan) and their malfeasant managers (Warren Feagins and John Milewski) and what happens when an ornery organ grinder and his mysterious monkey (Jack McCabe and AJ Ware) make a mess, leaving Irish Mary Poppins (Anne Sears) to clean it up, or at least explain it to us.

There were some tense, naughty scenes that made me think about tauntauns differently. I enjoyed the visceral use of the, well, viscera. And while the first act has chunks of gristle, the second act sizzles like fajitas. The more I watched, the more I became aware that Lady Gaga’s statements are utter tripe – that she IS a piece of meat to someone else, her body of work being cut up like a carcass and packaged into movable units, just like the rest of us. But what kind of accuracy can you expect from someone who judges themselves to be “the most judgment-free human being on the earth”? Or from a guy who desperately wanted a pair of sirloin slacks?

Ultimately, I have decided to abandon my search for Lady Gaga’s line of meat clothing. The near-perfect combo meal of American consumerism and pop activism had lost its lockjaw grip on me, thanks to the timely dissection made by the fine people of Jackalope Theatre Company. Thank Gaga her meat dress isn’t 4G and Flash-ready, or I’d be camped out at Best Buy, telling myself that factory workers don’t exist, or are at least un-American.

I’d like to thank the Saints for smiling at me demurely, and for showering me with Bacon Bits and glitter as I left the theatre.

A

-Mike Ooi

Easy Six (Factory Theatre)

The Factory Theatre is BACK with another EXTREME story of snowboarders taking the ULTIMATE trip to the UTTERMOST top of K2 when the most INTENSE avalanche ever AMBUSCADES them in a dark cave!

These 5 heroes led by the EFFULGENT Mickey Bocks (Songbird: Manny Tamayo) have to BATTLE for survival at all costs! As munitions expert Kenny (a RESPLENDENT Anthony Tournis) struggles to BLAST their way out of the white ABYSS, David ( Scott Pasko in his most UNCONTEMPTIBLE role to date) has to face his inner demons stemming from the loss of his little BROTHER to BREAST cancer.

The oxygen is BARREN. Life has become a TORMENTED SUCCUBUS! Mickey faces a series of hallucinations where he and his INAMORATA (a MESMERIC Allison Cain) tackle their past through a series of HYPERBOLIC masked dance scenes.

As Mickey and David slowly lose their minds, Lee (the PHYSICAL MASTERMIND Paul Metreyeon) hides his SOUL CLAWING EDEMA from the group, making a note wherein it tells the rest of the men how to eat his DISEASED body.

The group seems to have little HOPE. What can save them from this DISCONSOLATENESS?

A single PALADIN emerges in the form of Gary Thain (a luxurious Esteban Cruz) who carries his HEAVING friends to safety by GENTLY CARESSING the ice, which had never met a BLACK GAY GUY before either.


When they return to the lodge, life has kept moving, leaving the boys with new OUTRAGEOUS challenges to face. Returning from an event like that is hard.

They begin to drink away their DESPAIR. Life has become UNREASONABLE and CALLOUS.

Mickey finally sees a silver lining in the heart of Pepper (an ANGEL FACED Cat Dughi). Pepper has recently divorced the WICKED Ginger Pete (a NEFARIOUS turn by the legendary Timothy C. Amos) who has gone on an animated DRUG FUELED KILLING SPREE with his delirious henchmen Phillip and Bart ( the ENRAGED and VEHEMENT Blake Dalzin and Scott Minches)!

Mickey and the boys make COMPATRIOTS with a HOBO-WITH-A-HEART-OF-GOLD Foster Brooks (a MIRTHFUL John Moran) and a BLOODTHIRSTY Jerry Lewis (Ray Brazaski at his MEATY best).

Together with a group of Irish SLATTERNS (the incredible Robyn Coffin, Laura Korn, and Elizabeth Styles), they DEFEAT the Ginger Pete and make the small community safe for DRUNKEN GAMBLERS and JEZEBELS again!

Also there is some talk of a missing bottle opener or some shit.

This is not a play to be MISSED! This EXCEPTIONAL musical has VIGOROUS power and will make you feel VIBRANT and POTENT sexually.

A story of survival that shouldn't be IGNORED!!!


A

-Anderson Lawfer, Eric Roach

500 Clown Trapped (theatre review)

Hey, kids!

Do you like to laugh? To be scared? To contemplate empirical epistemology via social constructivism? I may have found the all-ages show you’ve been searching for.

To be sure, 500 Clown Trapped will dose you with enough wackiness, zaniness, and tomfoolery to keep even the sickliest ten-year-old buzzing around the house like a humming bird after a trip to the sugar globe. And if you kids love that sort of thing, boy are you in luck. Booger. But if you’ve been looking for a show to stoke your love of bleary-eyed nights spent awake in rigid contemplation, look no further. I’m sorry, munchkins, but unless you have a James Frederick Ferrier action figure in your toy chest, this show is going to go way over your head.

We meet our clowning friends, Adrian Danzig, Timothy Heck, and Leah Urzendowski as they are preparing a celebration of music and love. Our beloved trio enters through the audience banging drums, cymbals and each other. However, due to an “oversight” by “stage management” a massive white platform has been left onstage. Despite the clearly placed caution-tape, the clowns—full of whimsy and wonder—venture on to the stage with their instruments and are promptly trapped in a rather flimsy “cage.” Over the next sixty minutes, we watch these three hilariously attempt to escape the easiest trap imaginable via the most complicated solutions ever conceived. It is absolutely hilarious, but pause for a moment, children and ask yourself, “Why am I laughing?”

Your standard teleological argument could steer you away from modern tendencies towards belief in self-determinism. And you can retreat into that trope if you need to feel safe at night. You can say, “Some outside force has captured our heroes and is holding them against their will!” But what 500 Clown Trapped investigates so thoroughly, children, is the truth that you—in fact—trap yourself. And worse than that, you do it because you like it. And even worse than that: You do it better with friends.

Now go upstairs and do your homework.

500 Clown Trapped: A

-John Taflan

The Human Centipede & South Park Season 15 Episode 1 The Human CentiPad (compare/contrast review)

The Human Centipede (First Sequence) is a controversial 2009 horror movie from shock auteur Tom Six, and it is a colossal waste of time and effort.  I wasn't disgusted by the content of the film, because I'm from Missouri and have been inside a meth trailer.  Y'all ain't got nothing on the Show Me State, yo.  No, this movie is just terrible because it is more fun to talk about than it is to actually watch.  Let's break it down...oh, and Spoiler Alert for you perverts who might actually choose to ingest this poo through your anus-mouth.

There's an insane German doctor who is famous for separating conjoined twins and now he wants to join people together ass-to-mouth because why not?  His first experiment was joining 3 dogs together and he buried that failure in his yard under a headstone that reads "My Sweet 3 Dog."  Wait, it gets better.  So, there's these two American girls out to party and fuck Eurotrash and they get lost in the woods near this guy's house and they come in and ask for help and he roofies them and straps them down to....oh, blah blah BLAH.  Boom, he joins these 2 girls ass-to-mouth with some Japanese guy at the head of the centipede and the cops show up and there's a fight and really I should have spent my free time in a better way because I'm a father now and free time is hard to come by.  Oh, and there is a part where the Japanese guy shits in the girl's mouth and the doctor loves it and that was pretty funny.

There is only one reason (and it's a pretty flimsy reason, at that) to watch this abortion.  The mad German doctor, played by DIETER LASER.  This guy will re-teach you how to act.  Throw out everything you know, and just bow at the feet of LASER.  I never knew what it looked like when a mad German poop-freak doctor decided to swim naked in front of his own human centipede, until DIETER FUCKING LASER showed me.  In all seriousness, this guy is pretty good and I'd like to see him and Udo Kier have a crazy-off.  Of course, Udo wins because he banged Warhol.  That always gives you the extra point, right Lou Reed?

Unfortunately, the rest of the cast is terrible.  I guess it was a good choice to have the Japanese guy in front, because he could only speak Asian and the German guy didn't care what he said anyway.  The two girls were good once they shut the hell up (because their mouths were sewn to assholes).  I guess this could be a play, and it might be more interesting.  Or not, please don't get any ideas New Millenium Theatre Company.

This Tom Six guy is making a sequel called The Human Centipede (Full Sequence) in which there are 12 people joined ass-to-mouth in a long ass human bug thing.  Now, I'm no box office guru, but something tells me he should try a romantic comedy next.

But, but, BUT...if this film didn't exist, we wouldn't have South Park's extremely funny season opener "HUMAN CENTiPAD," a solid outing from Matt and Trey.  Not a classic episode by a long shot, but one with some great bits.

This episode pokes fun at the extremely long license agreements that everyone must agree to when downloading a new version of iTunes.  Unwittingly, Kyle clicks "I Agree" without reading the full agreement (which is just ludicrous, according to the show) and subjects himself to the business casual G-Men of Apple who take him away to be the middle part of the Human CentiPad.  Steve Jobs' plays the mad doctor in this case, and attaches 3 people ass-to-mouth and places an iPhone on the forehead of the Japanese head one (a funny nod to the film) and an iPad on the ass of the female rear one, leaving poor Kyle in the middle to eat shit in a very literal fashion.

The jokes were strong, and the social commentary about the Apple license agreements is pretty spot-on.  The only joke Trey and Matt missed was the chance to parody the insane DIETER LASER...a mad German poop-freak scientist?  Come on guys, you're slipping if you can't make fun of that.

But, we must circle back to what I originally said about The Human Centipede being more fun to talk about than to experience.  There really is no reason to watch the film...and I like gross horror movies!  Shit, I'm an apologist for HOSTEL, for God's sake.  But, when you get down to basics, the film is a 90 minute dirty joke with a horrible punch line.  At least South Park gives you a satisfying 20 minutes or so of good parody, which is all anyone asked for in the first place.  So, in closing, fuck you Tom Six.  Trey and Matt easily beat you at your own game.

The Human Centipede: D-
The Human CentiPad: B+

-Eric Roach, Anderson Lawfer

Woyzeck (The Hypocrites)

I don’t mean to sound dumb or anything, but what is going on with The Hypocrites’ Woyzeck? I mean, I get it and all but like, what’s up with it? These are questions that are asked with Sean Graney’s super quirky adaptation of Woyzeck, presented by The Hypocrites, now playing at the Chopin Theatre in Wicker Park.

Now, I’m a little biased because I did this show at B.U.—I played the second male lead, the Drum Major—and I like to think I know it pretty well. It is seriously one of the most important pieces of theatre that has ever been written. It’s about this soldier, Woyzeck, who—in our version, at least—is driven to murder his girlfriend, Marie, when she cheats on him with (you guessed it) the Drum Major. Of course, other things happen too, but that’s the main one.

Like I said, Sean’s show is super super quirky. And, the murder does happen in it, but it’s just different. It reminded me of Donnie Darko in some parts, Full Metal Jacket in others, and other times like those weirder movies that are out there sometimes. I don’t know. There are definitely certain things that characters do where you’re just like, what is going on here? But, they’re smart. I think it was really cool how they slapped the money when they got it. It shows you that the money is important, but also that it’s bad, too. Because, why would you hit something that you like? And Marie carries this rock around because she’s kind of crazy. She calls it her “baby” but I don’t think anyone was buying it. I know when we did this show at B.U. we had an actual fake baby that cried and that was really cool. (Actually, the money slapping thing was kind of offensive. We’re in a recession right now and I don’t think it’s right to show money—which some people don’t have—being treated like that. But that’s just me.)

Anyway, the set was really cool. And the costumes were really, really cool. But, I don’t know… I don’t want to come off as stupid or anything, but doesn’t Woyzeck take place in the 1800s? I mean, don’t get me wrong, the show is really cool, but like why was Woyzeck dressed in modern clothes? And, I’m sorry, the Drum Major didn’t even look like a drum major. Where was his hat? Where was his baton? I honestly didn’t even know he was the drum major until he was having sex with Marie (which only kind of happened). I mean, I get it, but I don’t know. And it sounded like they were using a different translation than we used when I did the show at B.U.

I liked Geoff Button a lot as Woyzeck, though. He reminded me of like, a really sad Ross from Friends. Especially, in that one episode where he gets in a fight with Rachel, and cheats on her but it’s not really cheating because they’re on a break. Lindsey Gavel is awesome as Marie, who isn’t really like Rachel all that much, actually. She’s kind of like, like Katherine Heigl in Knocked Up, but a little scarier. I mean, she’s really good. They’re both really good. In fact, everybody does great in this show:

Ryan Bollettino is so blonde and funny as the doctor. Erin Barlow is really funny as Marie’s friend and as the doctor’s girl. Ryan Bourque as Woyzeck’s friend, Andres, is really funny, too. Sean Patrick Fawcett is funny in a really great way as the Captain. Zeke Sulkes is not as funny as everyone else, but he doesn’t have to be because he’s supposed to be super scary, which he is! Walter Briggs definitely played the Drum Major differently than I did…but he was great and really funny.

I mean, I would definitely recommend being in a production of Woyzeck if you can, but this version was really cool and I would definitely go see it.

Woyzeck: A

-John Taflan

The Killing (Television Show AMC)

When was the last time you saw a show that made you miss "Twin Peaks"?
For me, it was last Sunday. The show that did this to me is entitled "The Killing" and it is on everybody who doesn't have HBO's favorite network, American Movie Classics or AMC as it is more widely known.
AMC is a network that goes back and forth between playing John Wayne movies and Scarface, and a few years ago, they decided that they were sick of movies and liked TV shows instead.

They have one show called Mad Men about this guy who lives in the 60's or 40's or whatever and he makes soap ads or some shit, I don't know. But I know there is substance abuse in it.

Then they have a show called Breaking Bad about the guy from Malcolm In The Middle where he is a meth dealer in chemo or something. More substance abuse.

They have another show, The Walking Dead, about a Police Officer and bunch of people on the run from zombies in the South. So you know all the zombies are racist and addicted to Oxycontin.


So you see, all of AMC's shows are about guys dealing with drugs and being in very adult situations. If this is the criteria we should use to judge The Killing, then the show is terrible.
If you compare this show against Twin Peaks, a similar storyline about a detectives solving one murder over the course of the series, then the show is terrible too, because it doesn't have any backwards talking midgets.

BUT, if you put it up against a show like According To Jim it is just fantastic.

The Killing starts with some cops finding a murdered girl named Rosie Larsen. This girl was like 16 years old. So these two detectives, one lady named Linden who has to move at the end of the week (ala Morgan Freeman in Se7en, or any old black man in any cop movie) and this young creep named Holder who was recently reassigned from Narcotics.
This guy Holder uses some tactics that maybe you would use in Narcotics investigation, but are probably uncouth when it comes to Homicide.

For example, he was trying to get some info from Rosie's classmates, so he hangs out at the school and smokes some weed and asks these girls if they wanna "party" with him. (We are all to assume that "party" means "fingerbang" by the way.) So they lead him down to the boiler room of the school, and that's where he finds the crime scene!

Also, there is a political campaign happening. You see, Rosie's body was found in the trunk of this guy, Darren Richmond's campaign car. Richmond is trying to be Mayor, so you know this isn't looking good for him.

Well, there are lots of suspects. There's her teacher (the front runner) named Bennet, Rosie's best friend Sterling (too stupid to do it), Rosie's uncle and dad's best friend Belko Royce (he probably just made out with her), and as we are just finding out now, the dad used to be a hitman for the mafia.

So maybe it was revenge?
Maybe he owed someone his firstborn child.

Anyway, listen. This show is pretty good. It's sort of slow and you can tell the writers didn't know it would get this far, so they are starting to sort of make some shit up to fill time.

The show was originally done in Danish and called Forbrydelsen.

*This show takes place in Seattle and it is always raining, so if you are scared of rain, or feeling a little blue, this will not put you in a better mood, but you can also catch Welcome To Mooseport on AMC and that will make you feel great.



A

-Anderson Lawfer, Eric Roach

The Conquest To The South Pole (Strawdog Theater)

It’s never been a better time to be alive. Change is sweeping the world, the sun is waking up from its long slumber, and the fast food chicken nugget wars have finally brought us the reasonably priced 20-piece McNugget meal from McDonalds. I can’t get enough of them, and now that they can be purchased for $4.99 (or the Meal Deal for $9.99, which also comes with two medium fries and two medium drinks), this treasure trove of delight is now within reach of the unemployed, who have long dreamed of something to distract them from the defeat of standing in line at the unemployment office.

Manfred Karge’s The Conquest of the South Pole, translated by Calvin McLean, Caron Cadle, & Ralf Remshardt, directed by Kimberly Senior, and produced by Strawdog Theatre Company, seeks to explain what every unemployed person did before Chicken McNuggets were invented – apparently engaging in reenactments in their attics. It makes sense to me, as this is what all Chicago theatre artists do while not getting paid – play make-em-ups in the attics, basements, lofts, and garages of more important buildings filled with employed people.

Senior commands an impressive design team to turn the Strawdog space - the attic above Tutto Fresco – into the attic of an unemployed dude and his lady. As I opened up my McNugget Meal Deal, I began to appreciate that I had two cup holders at my disposal – one for my medium Diet Coke, and one for my medium sweet tea. I get 2 different drinks to make it seem like I’m sharing the Meal Deal with someone else, so that the McDonalds employees don’t think that I’m a fatty. Sometimes I even pretend to be on the phone with the person I’m going to share it with, asking them their beverage preference. I get Sweet and Sour sauce with my nuggets as a precautionary measure, in case the nuggets are dry. Otherwise I prefer them au naturel.

The play starts strangely, the first few exploratory bites always being cautious – no one wants to bite into a dry McNugget. Thankfully, no Sweet and Sour was needed. The cast is pretty juicy and fresh – Jennifer Avery is a real stand-out here, though her character’s connection to fast food might have tipped the scales for me. But she’s also pretty and she acts good, which might be more important. The use of the space is great – functional and elegant – using two 10-piece McNugget boxes both provides an easily measurable benchmark in one’s race for the South Pole of satiety, as well as helping to maintain the illusion that someone is going to share their 20-piece McNugget Meal Deal with someone who is just about to show up.

Karge and his translators throw in a couple of dry nuggets towards the end, but Senior’s choice of sauces, the Sweet and Sour Justine Turner and the Hot Mustard Anderson Lawfer, help to finish off the box. I was glad that my grade-school cafeteria training of eating my French fries first saved me from having to share with the red-tinged gentleman to my right, who thoroughly enjoyed the play and none of my fries. My unwillingness to share my meal is fully validated by the message of the play – that while someone will eat McNuggets that are given to them, they will never be happy unless they can get their own, and will be forced to play make-em-ups in which they dream of reaching the Golden Arches of the South Pole, probably in your attic.

I’d like to thank the Saints for handing me my program in a pleasant manner, and for turning a blind eye to my enormous McDonalds bag.

A

-Mike Ooi

Exclusive Interview: Aly Renee Amidei

There's a new sheriff in charge of Horror Theatre in this town and her name is Aly Renee Amidei. She was recently appointed Artistic Director of Wildclaw Theatre Company.We had a chance to catch up with her after a long night and 8 whole racks of ribs.

Aly! So great to see you! Do you want to share these ribs with us for breakfast?

No thanks, I don’t eat meat from the bone...for breakfast.

Well, whatever. I mean, it’s a little disrespectful, but not the end of the world. So, what have you been up to lately?

Well, WildClaw Theatre just closed it’s most successful play ever, Carmilla.

I saw that!

Me too.

Now if I’m not mistaken, you adapted it into a play also. Is that right?

Yes. I had been mildly obsessed with the play since I was a teenager. WildClaw’s artistic director, Charley Sherman, was encouraging company members to write. So I took up the challenge and we wrote a proposal for the DCA space. We got picked...meaning, the City of Chicago called my bluff and I had no choice but to write it.

Now you say you were into it in high school... was that because you wanted to be taken away by an older, toothier, lesbian stranger?

I am not so sure I was that aware of the lesbian angle when I was 13...all I knew then was that it had vamps and girls. I REALLY liked vampires as a girl. But...now that I think about it I also REALLY liked The Hunger...which had older toothier lesbian vampires. Hmmm.

Well thank you for confirming my theory that all 13 year olds are lesbians. So now that was such a success for your young company, you have decided to take over the reigns as Artistic Director?

Well the company decided...I didn’t just roll in and punch Sherman in the groin. But yes, I will be the new artistic director starting in May. I am very excited. A bit woozy but excited.

I think you are a great choice, and let me tell you why. You, as a costume and set designer, have been involved in hundreds of productions, and know how to deal with that side, and also, you know more about the genre than almost anybody alive. Which in turn makes you super hot and also a little bit gross.

That is an amazing compliment. Thanks.

So, you are a member of some other organizations too, correct?

Yes. I have been at Strawdog for more than five years now...doing costumes, makeup, and a set. Plus writing for the Hit Factory. I recently was the makeup designer for The Master and Margarita.

So what have you learned from being under 2 different Artistic Directors that you can bring to your new job?

Nic (Dimond, Artistic Director at Strawdog) and Charley (Sherman, WildClaw) are super different. I mean there are the obvious differences...but both are passionate about the mission of these two companies. Nic really helped us with the ‘Whole Wide World in a Little Black Box’ concept: immersion, genuine human connections, etc...It looks good on paper...but also works when you are trying to make art. With WildClaw, the mission is putting horror on stage and taking it seriously. Sounds simple right? But it is deceptively tricky. Finding horror to actually put on the stage has been the biggest challenge. There is just not a lot of it out there that fits our mission. We will not being doing Little Shop or Rocky Horror. So we either need to write it ourselves or inspire the horror lovers of the world to write some awesome spooky theatre for us. We want horror to be infectious. And for that infection to spread...whoa...sorry this is getting weird.

Speaking of weird, I have been working on an adaptation of a dream I had that I think you guys might really like. It starts out with this Indian guy getting eaten by rats and birds and then he brings his half-ate ass to America and gets a job at a factory where he falls in love with this centaur but it turns out that it’s really a centaur ghost.

You had me at centaur.

So what’s up next for WildClaw?

Oh how I wish I knew. We definitely have Deathscribe coming up in December. This is our annual radio play festival. We will be opening up for submissions soon. But our next stage play is still being decided. We have a bunch of play readings scheduled and everyone is writing frantically.

Well we are so excited to see what the future holds. You guys are really getting at a market that hasn’t existed before.

Yeah and what is super cool is seeing people in the theatre that had never been to a live play before. And even better, is some of our horror audience is actually going to see more theatre....not just us

Well maybe next time you could talk to us more about some lesbian stuff.

Definitely. I am working on a play where a young girl is seduced by an older woman..but it turns out she is a werewolf....

Then it’s good you are a costume designer, so you can design your own merkins. Werewolf pubes are hard to read on stage.

My entire career has been leading towards that very goal.

-Anderson Lawfer, Eric Roach

The Woman In Black (First Folio)

What do you think about "Horror" plays?
I usually think they are dumb, because they are never scary. I always go to a play and think, "How...in this proscenium space, can you possibly scare me? I am a grown ass man!"
In fact, most scary plays are more historically based and not even the least bit frightening, but there are a few companies in town that can give you a jolt from time to time.
Where you might least expect a nutpunch of fright is in the heart of Oak Brook at First Folio Theatre Company.

I must admit that I don't know the first thing about First Folio. Mainly because I don't ever go to the suburbs, and when I do it's to go to Arby's or Walmart. It seems like it is managed and Artistically Directed by a couple people and that's it. Their lengthier Artistic Associates list boasts some big names including Nick Sandys (who is British) and Melanie Keller (who is this foxy little red head).
The talent on their list is unmistakable.
In Woman In Black the same holds true featuring two of Chicago's top talents.

Firstly, there's this dude named Kevin McKillip who has a speaking voice to rival the best in town. He also sort of has Steve Carrell face. Having Steve Carrell face is a compliment dressed up in a weird sounding statement, but mainly it means you have a defined nose and a strong chin, but your eyes are far enough apart and you can wear any color tie. You all should be so lucky enough to have Steve Carrell face.
McKillip's teammate on this project is none other than the legendary Joe Foust. Do you know about this guy Joe Foust? I bet you are immediately thinking of the magician and alchemist from the 1500's but that was Steve Foust. No, this is a different guy all together.
When I first moved to town, I spent some time hanging out with some Defiant Theatre people and this character Joe Foust was often the topic of conversation. His excellent acting skills were discussed, but more importantly, it was his wild streak that people really loved. For example, legend has it that during a performance of Defiant's "A Chorus Line", Foust punched an usher and then spit on a fellow cast mate. When asked to apologize, he quoted a line from "Equus" took off his pants and ran to a nearby graveyard. Now this is a mild story about Joe Foust, and while I had never seen him perform, I have had the opportunity to have a cocktail with him and meet his beautiful family and children, and I have to tell you that he is one of the sweetest men I have ever met in my life. And better than all of that, he is really an incredible actor.

In Woman In Black, Foust and McKillip play these 2 dudes who are going to be putting on a play version of this story that happened to one of them. It concerns a man who goes to this mansion because he needs some receipts from this lady who just died. When he gets out there to the mansion, no one in the town will look at him or talk to him, presumably because they are scared of the house. Well the guy gets this dog and they stay out at the house and also there is a ghost.

I don't want to spoil anything, but there is a ghost.

So that's all I can tell you about the play I'm afraid, but you gotta see these guys make it awesome. It's really great, and you get to go see this really cool mansion where the show is called the Mayslake Peabody Estate. So if you are looking for a great place to take a date this weekend, you will definitely with out question get laid from taking them to see this play.


A+

-Anderson Lawfer, Eric Roach

C T Gaaaaaaaaay (Red Line)

Our own reviewer, Monica Reida, has decided to take the biggest challenge of all. She will be reviewing ALL CTA train lines and bus lines over the next few months for our website. If you have a question or comment for her, leave it here!

The Red Line is the train I take the most often and thanks to that I have some really freaky stories to tell. Like the time I was coming back from a show at the Side Project, and the train I was on stopped, opened the doors, and the lights went out. Or times people vomit on the train. Or have sex on the train. But if you’ve taken the Red Line, you’ve probably already seen this. The other stuff, not being on a train that suddenly turns into a scene from a horror film.

(Side note: Who the hell would have sex on the Red Line?)

The Red Line isn’t like the Brown Line, which has really nice, semi-new stops. Half of the Red Line stops are nice and the other half are decaying and/or smell like piss. One of the most notable creepy Red Line stops is the Wilson Stop, which I once used to go see a Pegasus Players show, back when they were still a big thing. Guys, that stop is incredibly scary. I mean, sure there’s Truman College and a Harold’s Chicken Shack nearby, but that stop freaks me out.

Then there are stops like the Chicago, Lake, and Jackson Stops, which have nice tile work and escalators that actually work. The Grand and North/Clybourn stops are getting there, mostly because Apple decided to finance the renovation of one of those stops. The Harrison stop isn’t fancy and the entrance seems to be leaky, but they’ve got nice haikus to read while you wait for the train. So if you’re into haikus, that’s great for you.

The cars themselves vary. If you get one of the sexy new trains the CTA’s testing, that’s great for you. Otherwise, you can get fairly clean rail cars or cars where all of the seats either have gum or Flamin’ Hot Cheetos dust on them. The other night I was on a car that had a bunch of sand covering the floor as if a sandbag had burst. I have no clue how that got there unless someone decided to do a mobile sandbox.

Plus, if you take the Red Line, you sometimes have to fight teenage girls with Forever 21 bags for priority seating if you’re in a cast, boot, or on crutches. Even if you’re like, “Hey, I’m in a boot because my foot got injured. I need to sit down and rest my foot,” they’re like, “Nuh uh, my bag of cheap clothing and I deserve this seat.” Then you say, “Please?” while getting wide-eyed and sad only to be ignored while they feverishly text their boyfriends.

Also, the Red Line never seems to run quickly when you need it to. I’ll be on the Red Line on the weekend and my travel time is half of what it is when I’m on the train at 7:25 a.m.. I then think to myself, “Why can’t you run this fast when I have to be somewhere on time?”

Taking the Red Line is a love/hate relationship. Most of the time, it will get you to where you need to go because it’s the closest to your destination. Sure, it smells bad, is dirty, and sometimes breaks down in between North/Clybourn and Clark/Division (which always sucks), but sometimes you have to take it because the Brown Line won’t get you to where you’re going and you live too far away from the Brown Line. Plus, the Red Line runs 24-hours a day, which always comes in handy when you go to a late night show or go barhopping. Or go to a late night show and then go barhopping.

The Red Line stop at Garfield is also nicer than the Green Line stop. Just throwing that out there.

Sure, there are a lot of other lines on the L that are much nicer. (By “a lot,” I mean three.) But sometimes you’ve got to take the Red Line and it works well for getting you to and from your apartment and job. Most of the time.

Seriously though, CTA, fix the Wilson Stop. People probably want to go to the Harold’s Chicken Shack on the North Side.

C+

B, if you get the new trains.

-Monica Reida

The Three Faces of Doctor Crippen (Strange Tree Group)

I'm sure by now you have the term "First World Problems". It is a phrase used to describe issues we may come across in our lives that in the grand scheme of things, aren't terribly bad. Problems like, bad tasting tap water and chlamydia. Problems like parking meter buyouts and lines at the Six Flags.

These are all valid problems for us to have, because they happen to all of us in developed countries. In the scope of our fairly comfortable lives, things that cause us stress can kill us the same way a ruthless dictator or vicious lion can kill a dude in a smaller 3rd world country.

Now there is another term that we are going to be discussing today. That term is "White Man's Problems" and is totally different from "First World Problems".

What is a "White Man Problem"? It certainly isn't a problem that only white men deal with, but it IS a problem that if you ever imagined it happening in your head, the lead would definitely be a white fella. Maybe Ray Romano or Tim Allen. Problems that are sort of ridiculous in that they shouldn't be problems for ANYone EVER.
Problems created by arrogance and ignorance for yourself. For example, faulty Scuba diving equipment. Molesting Choir boys at your Church. Being trapped in an avalanche while you are snowboarding. Hoarding cats. Murdering your Vaudeville star wife in London and fleeing to America with your secretary who is disguised as your son. Choking to death at a Van Halen concert. Slipping on watermelon at a Gallagher show. Sleeping with your therapist. Turning into a mutant with super powers.

WAIT!! WAIT!! WAIT!!

Let's go back a couple there... Murdering your Vaudeville star wife in London and fleeing to America with your secretary who is disguised as your son? "That seems pretty specific" you say.

Well it is specific because that's what the play I saw was about! "The Three Faces of Doctor Crippen" is about a white man's problem.

Strange Tree Group, admittedly one of my favorite theatre companies, has set up house at the luxurious Steppenwolf Garage space. This space has a lot to offer a new company searching for it's audience because #1, it says Steppenwolf right in the name there, and #2, it says Garage right in the name too and parking is expensive these days, so a garage is a welcome change of pace.

Emily Schwartz, the Artistic Director and house playwright for the company is interested in a sort of "Lemony Snicket with a side of dick jokes" aesthetic that I really like. Her ability to jump back and forth between humor and authentic emotional realism is unrivaled as a Chicago playwright and maybe in the world. You don't see plays like this anywhere else.

Do you ever get sick of young playwrights who only wanna talk about the dangers of life and genocide and shit like that? Me too.

A common theme I find in her work is loss or escape which are certainly prevalent themes in a lot of work around town, but she doesn't treat it like a bad thing. Loss can be celebrated and escape can be dangerous in the way it is in novels without winking at the audience or somehow bargaining with them to take the trip with you. She doesn't spend a lot of time on the why and spends more time on the hope and confusion that comes along with it.

Sort of like Tracy Chapman's "Fast Car". Which by the way is the jam escape and loss song.

Schwartz's material would be useless though, without her trusty cast of goofballs from Indiana University. These dudes...
Let me tell you something. We all SAY we are in ensembles or whatever, and we all SAY we play off each other the way we should but I encourage all of you and your fruity ensembles to go see these dudes. They control the stage with swagger and ease. They believe in what they are doing and have developed timing together to create a new thing. Confidence is their secret weapon, y'all.

"Doctor Crippen" is about this guy who has three distinct personalities. Private (the workhorse Scott Cupper), Fantasy (the curly headed dreamboat Matt Holzfeind), and Public (the best fucking speaking voice in town Stuart Ritter). These three personalities navigate this doctor's decision to murder his terribly horrible and disgustingly crude wife (the magnanimous and flourishy Kate Nawrocki). I mean, this bitch had it coming. She has been blowing dudes from all over England in her husband's house. PLUS she is an American that has moved to England, so you know all these guys are bragging about getting head from an American broad. So Crippen falls in love with his secretary (the prudish harlot Delia Baseman), they hop on a boat to America and are being pursued by the legendary Inspector Dew (the completely mystifying in every way Bob Kruse).
So Crippen dresses his secretary up as his son to fool the other guys on the boat, and get to America to safety. Well this plan is just super ignorant in a lot of ways, but the main reason is because Mexico is right next to America. In Mexico they welcome people like him. Mainly because he is a Doctor.
They don't welcome murderers in Mexico.

Anyway, back in England, there are 3 women with 1 personality called the Guild or something and they are just perfect as well. Everybody in this play is wearing white face (like it isn't white enough) but in turn, it makes it harder to emote with your face. So the ability these women have at communicating expressions is great. They are for the record, the always wonderful Carol Enoch, the Carol Burnett-y Jennifer Marschand and the glorious Jennifer Henry.

The 3 different personalities of the Doctor don't start off as distinct as they need to for the transition that happens. Ya see, as the Doctor becomes increasingly paranoid the personalities start to become one, but it is unclear which is which at the top. And of course, this play is not about anything that will make you think or start a revolution over, but sometimes that is ok, too.

If you can get past that, then you are gonna have a great time!
Go see this Goddammed play or ELSE!!


A

-Anderson Lawfer, Eric Roach

I Am Montana (Mortar Theatre Company)

This review reprinted with permission from The Drudge Report:

Conservative culture warrior and play-maker, Samuel D. Hunter, has crafted an eye-popping exposé of the impending liberal threat in America’s heartland. Long before James O’Keefe bravely pulled left-wing America’s pants down and spanked its flabby behind with his justice-spoon (don’t forget to donate to his ‘relieve my credit card debt’ campaign at http://www.theprojectveritas.org), Samuel D. Hunter was uncovering the true effects of dumb-o-crat policies and revealing the march towards perversion taking place in the values stronghold of our nation.

The result of his years of muckraking is the committed satire, I Am Montana, now receiving its Chicago premiere with Mortar Theatre Company. Sure, on its surface I Am Montana may appear to be the whimsical sort of socialist fairy tale the left-wing media will fall all over themselves to shove down your throat. And in a way, their ignorant enthusiasm will be beneficial for the piece; a butt in a seat is a butt in a seat. But while your standard Pelosi-loving audience member is sipping away on his latte, bragging about his sushi dinner, and inflating the deficit with his bleeding-heart “social justice,” you will be discovering the truth—a little word our liberal-minded buddies seem to have difficulty with. Remember, my friends: It’s not about what you watch but how you watch it.

Let’s look at the facts: A young man, Eben Shamir (the excellent Derek Garza), with a great customer service job at the up-and-coming multi-national corporation, Valumart, is asked to give a speech at the company’s annual conference and appear in their new television commercial; pretty good stuff. The conference/commercial opportunity is in the great state of Iowa and as Eben calls the great state of Montana his home, he hops in his GMC Jimmy and heads east (the ground transportation angle is an great “screw you” to the TSA). Eben is accompanied by his coworker and best friend, Tommy (a heart-breaking Sentell Harper), and the hilarious “drug addict” cum gun advocate Dirk (the hilarious Josh Nordmark). So you’ve got three boot strap-pulling go-getters well on their way to celebrity and fiscal solvency when what do you think happens? The liberal menace sticks its filthy finger into their American pie.

In his powerful new book, I Think, Therefore I Am…NOT a Liberal, renowned culture-knower and Professor of Histrionics Calvin A. Doosher identifies the seven symptoms of the liberal mind. I won’t go into them all right here as it really is a fascinating read, but I think number six, “Forced Sympathization and the Secret Liberal Brainwash,” is especially prescient to this piece.

With a very clever dramatic stroke, play-maker Hunter has made the choice to haunt our three protagonists (not proletariat, mind you) with the encroaching threat of Obama’s American plan: Terrorism, homo sin-uality, and anti-Coporatism that will chase every remaining job away from this fair land while encouraging us to sodomize each other and blow everything up for no reason.

We meet these three boys in the prime of their lives and watch haplessly as the forced liberal agenda—first appearing to them in visions, then perverting and ultimately twisting their fragile minds and bodies—tears them apart. It would be just like ol’ Barry over there in the White House to force you to sympathize with a terrorist (the fantastic Nicholas Roy Ceasar, doubling as the delightful Valumart spokesperson, Valupig) and Hunter has spared no vitriol towards the administration on this count. I won’t reveal the details, but Eben has a lot to combat as he stares into the dark hole of evil temptation.

You see Eben’s America should be an America of opportunity; an America of Freedom. In America, Eben has the right to choose where he wants to work, how he wants to get to a work related conference, and with whom he wants to spend his time while he’s getting there. And, God bless it, he’s even got the right to take care of a plant if he wants. It’s all a man can do in this crazy world. Now I ask you: Who the heck is going to tell you that you can’t take care of a plant if you want? Who is going to look you in the eye and say, “We’re gonna force you to get another job”? Who has the right to shove terrorist-humanizing so far down your throat you can’t even breathe anymore? Nobody. Help us up! We’re running out of air!

Samuel D. Hunter and director, Rachel Edwards Harvith have cleverly planted these clues for us to uncover. The threat is clear. The solution is simple.

Now, some in the “media” will try to claim that corporations are slowly destroying our men and women by forcing them to shill for nation-sized conglomerates who are accountable to no one and whose manipulation of the American government has lined their pockets with our sweat-soaked dollars while they move their manufacturing jobs and bank accounts to countries whose tax codes and working conditions are such that a Cambodian child will work eighteen hours a day at sixty cents an hour to put a poly/cotton blended t-shirt on the racks of those same stores who will quash any attempt their employees make to better their lives which would destroy even the strongest spirit after enough time and all so they can balloon their profits to fuck everyone out of everything they make and avoid paying a single cent of tax just when the country needs it most. They will claim that, but they will be wrong. Look at the facts.

I Am Montana: A

-John Taflan

Dirty Blonde (BoHo Theatre)

"Dirty Blonde," from a strictly dramaturgical standpoint, is a solid play, but when you add the cast of BoHo Theatre's production to the mix- hot damn, do things get good! Before seeing the show, I knew very little about Mae West except that she was exceedingly clever and kind of a hooch, so I assumed "Dirty Blonde" would be a one-dimensional "sexy funny" play about a "sexy funny" woman. Well, I feel like an asshole, because I was wrong.

"Dirty Blonde" is half biography of Mae West, a telling of how her rapier wit and loose morals secured her place as a pop culture icon, and half fictitious tale of how two Mae West devotees find their way to each other. For West-neophytes there's just enough history to keep you up to speed, and for West-aficionados the show hits her high points without dragging the show down with exposition. Then you've got a slow-burning relationship story that gets odder and odder, but which is played with such sincerity that it doesn't even seem all that weird. (And trust me, it's pretty weird.)

There's a cast of three actors that portray about a dozen roles between them. They sing, dance, do accents, play piano, wrestle, and more. Not only are they a talented bunch, but they're incredibly likable. (I just read over a review I did of another BoHo production and I wrote that they were very likable, too. Props to BoHo for consistently finding performers that I like- I should let them start setting up dates for me.) This is important because the warmth and believability of the actors keep the show from veering into campy bio-drama, and keep it as a sincere piece of Theatre. (I capitalized the "T" because Theatre is important!)

Nicholas Bailey masterfully tackled a broad range of character roles, serving as somewhat of a narrator for the biographical parts of the show. He also served as the show's resident ivory tickler, but his standout role was probably as Ed Hearn, Mae West's flamboyant pal. David Tibble also skillfully handled a number of old-timey character parts, but he really shined as Charlie, one of the show's awkward protagonists. The dorky sweetness of Charlie played a nice contrast to his broader ensemble roles. Anne Sheridan Smith, who split her time as Mae West and Jo, the show's other protagonist, was really quite wonderful. As Jo she was sweet yet plucky, but then as Mae she'd immediately snap to brassy, sharp and vulgar. You liked both characters for different reasons, yet there was a commonality that the two shared that made you understand why Jo was such a Mae West fan.

The show was 100 minutes without an intermission. The show moved fast enough that it really didn't need it, but, well, I wouldn't have objected had there been one.


A-

-Dyan Flores