Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Eric and Andy's Musical Chairs!

Do you love Eric AND Andy?
Well come on out this Friday to 3829 N. Broadway Ave in Chicago Illinois to see your heroes put down their collective pimp hand on a new game show that is sure to delight your senses and make you feel happy that you were there and not sad at all about yourself!
Wouldn't that be nice for a change?
The show is at 11pm and admission is $10 if you are not wearing a costume, or $5 if you are wearing a costume!
It's a great chance for you to win fabulous prizes that you can then give to other people that you know during the holiday season!

Monday, October 12, 2009

Celebration of 40 Followers! (review party)

Dearest readers,
Congratulations for getting in on the ground floor of this sure-to-not-miss venture called "Reviews You Can Iews!"
As a dessert for you all, we will be reviewing your suggestions for the week!
Simply add a comment to this post suggesting a thing, play, film, or person you would like reviewed, and our team will move quickly and with vigor towards a review just for you and everyone else.
Also, please suggest our page to your friends! When we hit 60 followers, you will all receive a free thing to make your day better!
Thanks again!

-Anderson Lawfer, Eric Roach, the whole Iews Team

Friday, October 9, 2009

Fat People Who Call Themselves "Mama" (American Citizens)

Let me preface this by saying that I love my mother. She means the world to me. So do my fat gay friends and black ladies.
Now that being said, Andy has an immediate dislike for referring to himself in the third person, but even then, he doesn't nickname himself "Mama".
Can you imagine the backlash from girlfriends and family members?

Mama needs to take a piss.
Mama loves cookies.
Mama has ashy elbows.

I don't feel like I really need to argue this much, but on a recent bus ride, I sat with 2 large men we can assume were homosexual and another African American woman on the phone and all of them were referring to themselves as Mama, and it's safe to assume that none of them were speaking to their children.
"Mama's out of cigarettes."
"Oh, girl, Mama just quit smoking, don't talk about that."
"I know, girl, but Mama had some dranks and needs a butt."


Anyway, stop it please.
-Anderson Lawfer, Eric Roach

Thursday, October 1, 2009

Twitter (social media)

Twitter is for hooligans and douchebags with nothing better to do than tell us why they are important. Sort of like blogs or Us magazine. F.

-Eric Roach, Anderson Lawfer