This Sunday is a very important day. It marks the birthday of "Reviews You Can Iews" restaurant critic and Wrigleyville hero, Josh Vaughn. I had a chance to chat with Josh about his plans for the future and what to expect from his upcoming birthday party this Sunday at F.O. Mahoney's. 3701 N. Broadway in Chicago.
Andy
Yo Josh!
Josh
WHADUUUUUPP BRO!
Andy
How's your summer been going?
Josh
HIGH FIVE HIGH FIVE HIGH FVIE1
HIGH FIVE !
Fuckin great, bruh! Other than the Cubs, bro.
Andy
What happened to the Cubs?
Josh
Bro, seriously. Bro...Bro
Andy
What?
Josh
In the shitter, man. Tanked mid season.
Lou's gone. D Lee's gone.
Whatever bro. So whassup Andy?
Andy
Just enjoying the summer, myself. I hear your birthday is coming up soon?
Josh
FUCK YEEAAAAHHHH! GONNA BE OFF THE HOOK, SON!
Andy
How old are you going to be?
Josh
Having shots at F.O. Mahoneys, this Sunday night, the 5th.
Turning 32, bruh. one more year til my Jesus birthday.
Andy
Are you doing anything special?
Josh
Got my buddy Mike Collins, who's the owner, cuz bro, I've got peeps, bro, to hook us up.
Andy
Are you gonna be drinking shots?
Josh
Yeah, man. Got my boys Travis, Trent, and Tyler hanging out
Andy
Any chicks?
Josh
Fuck yeah, bruh! Jaeger bombs, O-bombs, whatever. J-mo. Bring it
bro.
bro.
bro.
Seriously?
Who the fuck you think you're talking to?
Andy
Ummm... Josh Vaughn?
Josh
This is Josh Vaughn, school career assists leader in lacrosse at Southwest Missouri State.
Thats right!!!
Will there be chicks!?
Andy
My b, Josh.
So, when everybody gets there, are you going to make them sing a song or something?
Josh
only Trista, Terra, Taylor, Tiffany, Tressa, and whoever else can't resist the Vaugh-a-thon!
Oh yeah, the shots song that Little John raps
Andy
Fuck yeah, bro.
Josh
Vaughn-a-thon
Oh, bro, I got a whole mix from my I pod set to go
Andy
Josh, what do you want to change about your life during this next year?
Josh
Got Dre, Tupac, NWA
Change? Hmm, thats a good question.
Andy
I know.
Josh
Probably sewttle down, find a nice girl to start a family with in the burbs.
Psych!!!
Gotcha Andy!
I aint changing nothing, bro!
Living Life a quarter mile at a time, bruh!
Andy
That's the way that life was meant to be lived for you, my Bro.
You are one in a million.
Josh
Bruh, I am the center of the Wrigleyville universe.
If I go, it would be like the sun disappearing or something.
Andy
A Prince of Wrigleyville. Josh, tell me a story about your birthday last year, and maybe it will entice people to come this year.
Josh
Well, around 4 in the morning, I was mackin on this chick at Nick's Uptown, and her boyfriend shows up. Some hipster dude, with glasses and a mustache. You know, the kind of dude without a job. Fuckin loser.
Andy
and?
Josh
so he's all, excuse me, but you're in my seat, and I'm all like, no dude, I'm just awesome. And he's all like, Death Cab, or this and that, so Me and Travis drag his ass out, cuz I know the bouncer, he's cool with me, and we throw him out.
Cuz, bro...it's my birthday.
Andy
Woah dude. This seems like an awesome party!
Josh
so Travis and I do some more shots
and the girl...leaves!
I was all, we did you a favor!
So we go back out, the dude is still there. Waiting for her. So we both punch him in the face.
Andy
Josh. Did this really happen?
Josh
I think so, I got the police report around here somewhere.
Andy
Ok, ok. Sorry to doubt you.
So give me a brief rundown of what is happening this Sunday.
Josh
Its ok. Lots of people can't believe the awesome
Well, I'll be there around 6, the bros may be coming a little later after volleyball.
I'm gonna get some food, cuz they got a pretty decent menu, bruh.
After I fill up, gonna order some grape bombs to start, you know, for vitamins. Then they got pitchers, bro!
Like the only Wrigley bar that does without paying $20!
Andy
Do they have chicken wings?
Josh
Fuck yeah they do!
Fuckin awesome ones!
Then, when the time's right, we're going either to Uptown Lounge or the Admiral. Get some lap dances
Hottest dancers in the city there.
Andy
Yeah?
My sister works there.
Josh
Yeah, I know
Andy
Ok, well I can't wait to see you on Sunday night!
Happy birthday!
Josh
Me too, bro! Drink alot of water this week!
Andy
Any last thoughts for the public?
Josh
Yeah,
Life isn't a race. It's a Vaughn-a-thon.
Andy
Thanks Josh!
Josh
Fuck yeah, dude.
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